I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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