First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
why do cheetos always look like penises
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
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