idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
