He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm determined to sit on that face.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
