I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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