im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
