..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
