Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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