i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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