We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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