He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
