i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
