Heybabeimwearingurpanties
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
