he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
