But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
