Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Randomize
