apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
