today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
There are leaves in my underwear?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
So. Much. Porn.
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