No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
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