she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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