I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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