i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
May the power of my ass compel you!!
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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