so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
