your room smells of hookers.
And success
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Randomize
