dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
