I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
