i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
