She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
