apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Randomize
