sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
