If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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