Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
