THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Randomize