Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
