let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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