What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize