Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
