i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Randomize
