White coat. Heels.
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize
