The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
