Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
