covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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