seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
