brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i think my tv is drunk
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
