she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
