I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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