Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
i think my cat just said my name.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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