oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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