Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
