My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
